This may come as no surprise, but, at the same time James Harrison of the Pittsburgh Steelers was making history for the longest play ever in a Super Bowl game, I was trying to figure out exactly what the heck happens during a football game. Sure, I'm a sports enthusiast, but football to me always seems like a bunch of angry men charging at each other. However, after seeing an exhilarating Super Bowl 2009, I'm left to believe that football is just like any other sport. You don't think so? Well, let me prove it to you.

Capitalizing on a bad throw by the Arizona Cardinals, James Harrison catches the ball and takes off like Usain "Lightning" Bolt. As he passes the 60 yard line, he dodges a few men like Kobe Bryant. Then, he does an amazing Jackie Joyner-Kersee long jump over a few fallen defensive players as he encroaches on the 45-yard line.

Determined to maintain his Venus & Serena Williams' stamina, he journeyed forward. But, his goal was almost lost at the 10-yard line when he was forced to walk a tight rope like Mary Lou Retton on a balance beam. Finally, he gets knocked down from his blind side like the recipient of a Mike Tyson blow. Nonetheless, nothing is lost but the wind he needs to stand up and play again. Who cares about his wind? He just scored a touch down and it's the longest play in Super Bowl history!

Congratulations, James Harrison! Who needs to know a darn thing about football when you've incorporated 6 different sports into a single play in one game? Dude, I'm wearing my Mike Piazza T-shirt from now on. I've gottacatch your next game.